On Being a Parent

I'd planned to rail on a bit about the indoctrination of America's oh-so-impressionable youth (not by the president but by parents), but decided to take a moment to talk about our children. What?! That's right, we, too, have children...just not the human kind. Our little family currently consists of two humans, four cats, and a dog, and when one of them gets sick, like Boo is with heartworms, we take it every bit as seriously as you more traditional parents do when your kids get sick. We worry and fret. We begin to figure out how to rearrange our schedules to accommodate visits to the vet and treatment. We adjust our sleeping arrangements and our daily routines. We take it all very seriously.

When the vet came back with an estimate of about $700 for the "Gold Standard" treatment, we just said okay. There goes our dreams of a high-end TV, but that's alright. And it may mean that we won't get to use our free AMEX travel voucher after all because we won't have enough money to buy one ticket, but, again, that's fine. Wouldn't you sacrifice the same for a member of your family? It's all just stuff, and Boo is, well, he's Boo.

We don't normally refer to Boo, Jackson, Lucy, Algebra, and Beanie as "our kids." That's what crazy animal lovers do. We know they aren't "real" children like you probably have running around the house right now. But they might as well be. We don't just care for them; we center our lives around them. The nice, social times we spend in Peachtree City are always cut short because we have to get home to feed and go for walks. I have no idea what percentage of our monthly income goes towards pet food alone, but it's significant. Like you (I hope), we don't feed our kids crap. We break up fights, soothe tempers, enforce manners, teach, reward, discipline, and play. I know you're thinking there's much more to being a human parent than what it takes to "parent" a dog or cat, and perhaps so, but that's not my point. Don't be so dense.

We only just learned that Boo was diagnosed with heartworms even before we adopted him, but no one told us. We still would've adopted him, though, because we knew he was the one. He can be a pain in the ass (and so can your kid; just ask any restaurant employee) and sometimes it's hard deal with him. He's a dog; it's not like he understands me when I try and reason with him. Still, I try. Boo got his first shot today and gets his second tomorrow, and then for six weeks he has to be confined to one level of the house with only minimal exercise. It won't be easy and will pretty much suck most of the time, but it's what you do for those you care for, for those who depend on you, for your kids, for your family.

Go Boo.